Speaking with confidence isn’t a gift, it’s a skill. Vinh Giang reveals the blueprint to mastering the art of communication in this 20 minute clip of the full episode.
The Voice as an Instrument and Negotiating Reality
- Communication ability is the essential skill needed to negotiate whatever reality one desires.
- Individuals should view their voice as an instrument to be played, rather than just a tool to be used. Depending on how this instrument is played, it changes and shifts how others feel.
- Most people neglect their "vocal image," whereas they spend significant time on their visual image. When a person speaks, the assumptions others form based on visual image are transformed into definitive beliefs.
- Improving communication skills can profoundly change the trajectory of one's life by making those who feel "invisible" visible.
- Success requires proficiency in both technical skills and great communication skills (Showmanship); brilliant ideas often go unnoticed if the founder lacks the communication ability to do them justice. The world often perceives individuals based on their communication skills rather than solely their technical ability.
- It is the speaker's responsibility to learn how to shine their light brightly and communicate their value clearly, as the audience is not responsible for seeing the brilliance within them.
The Five Core Vocal Foundations
The following five elements, when mastered, introduce vocal variety, leading to clarity and impact:
- Melody (Pitch Variety): This refers to the different notes a voice can hit and the variety used. A limited melody range or a repetitive "sing song voice" can make people dislike or disconnect from the speaker. The siren technique (reading low, then high, then back down) is a way to wake people up to the power of their voice and expand vocal range.
- Rate of Speech: Varying the rate of speech prevents monotony. To auditorily highlight a point, slow down; to convey energy or charisma, speed up. The average rate of speech is around 150 words per minute, with 150–180 wpm being a good range. Nervousness causes many people to speed up considerably.
- Volume: Volume is critical as it carries all other vocal foundations. To auditorily highlight a point, one can go very quiet or very loud. Too low a volume is a default "shy" behavior, while too much volume without other foundations can sound aggressive or arrogant.
- Tonality (Emotion): Tonality reflects the emotion present in the voice. The face acts as a "remote control" that allows the speaker to add emotion into their voice. Showing appropriate facial expressions is a powerful, non-interrupting way to convey that one is listening and locked in.
- Pause: Silence is the most important "note" in speaking. Pausing intensifies the emotion that immediately preceded it (e.g., anger, sadness) and gives the listener necessary time to process the weight of the statement. Pausing is also the specific habit needed to replace filler words and auditory clutter such as "um," "uh," or "like".
Improving Communication: Techniques and Mindset
- The suggested three-step process for increasing self-awareness is "Record and Review". This involves:
- Recording five minutes of impromptu speech while standing.
- Conducting an auditory review (listening with the screen muted) to assess the vocal foundations.
- Conducting a visual review (watching with the sound muted) to identify non-functional physical behaviors (e.g., fidgeting, swivelling).
- Reviewing a transcription to expose auditory clutter (filler words and nonwords).
- Once problem areas are identified, focus on only one thing for 12 weeks, following the concept of "Kaizen" (relentless improvement).
- New behaviours should be initially tried on "neutral ears" (strangers who have no preconceived idea of the speaker's usual style) because this helps the new behaviours stick without immediate negative judgment.
- Objections that the new communication style "feels fake" or "phony" arise because the speaker is playing vocal "keys" they are unfamiliar with, not because the sound is fundamentally inauthentic.
- Change is often resisted because people are attached to their current identity, which, despite any negative aspects, feels safe and familiar. Adopting a new identity leads to radical change faster than merely trying to learn a new habit.
Physical Presence and Hand Gestures
- Executive presence is composed of vocal presence and physical presence. Physical presence is enhanced by using hand gestures within the Power Sphere—the area between the belly button and the eyes.
- Speakers should ensure their elbows are off their sides and they take up space, avoiding the tendency to "T-Rex it" (playing small).
- Key foundational gestures include:
- Plator: Palms facing up, showing openness (lacks authority).
- Leveler: Palms facing down, conveying authority and control (often naturally lowering the pitch of the voice).
- Blamer: Pointing (can be softened by using the full hand).
- Computer: The "thinker pose" (one arm across, one hand at the chin), signalling that the speaker is processing information.
- Distractor: A visual and auditory pattern break (e.g., a clap and shooing movement) used to recapture the audience's attention during a presentation.
Conversational Skills and Strategies
- The High-Low-Buffalo Game: This game helps spark conversations and build connection, particularly among colleagues who struggle to get past small talk. Participants share a "High" (something great), a "Low" (something difficult), and a "Buffalo" (something interesting/random). This strategy gives multiple conversational threads (three per person) and requires vulnerability.
- Small Talk Mastery: To manage small talk and avoid turning it into "Big Talk," use the 3-2-1 framework (three steps, two types, or the one thing) to deliver focused responses. Use questions that encourage deeper connection, such as "What do you do in your free time?" instead of occupational inquiries.
- Storytelling: Move from merely "reporting" a story to reliving it for the audience. This is achieved by including VAKS ingredients: Visual, Auditory (dialogue), Kinesthetic, and Smell details. The story should conclude with application—the big takeaway or lesson.
- Yes And Technique: In difficult conversations or when receiving criticism, use "Yes And" instead of "Yes But". "Yes But" creates antagonism by negating the other person's point, whereas "Yes And" acknowledges their reality and moves the conversation in a positive direction.
Optimising Online Communication (Zoom)
- Since people naturally lose their vocal foundations in front of a webcam, online communication demands that the speaker adopt a mindset of "generosity" with their energy, bringing a much bigger version of themselves to the screen.
- To be effective on Zoom, optimize the visual and auditory setup:
- Ensure camera placement shows the full torso (social/personal space) to allow for hand gestures, rather than appearing in the intimate space (head only).
- Utilize three-point lighting (key, fill, and back light) to look clearer and crisper.
- Use a high-quality external microphone and a minimum 1080p external camera.
Accent, Articulation, and Identity
- Accents themselves are generally not the problem; rather, the difficulty lies in poor articulation and pronunciation.
- Lack of clarity in a second language often occurs because the speaker is using the mouth movements of their native language to speak the new one. This can affect perception of intelligence and lead to discrimination, as 76% of employers surveyed in 2006 admitted to discriminating based on accent.
- Desensitization to the sound of one's own voice (which initially sounds deeper and richer due to hearing vibrations through muscle and bone) occurs through repeatedly recording and listening to it via air (as others hear it).
- The difference between an introvert and an extrovert is solely related to how they expend energy in social interactions; an introvert must be highly diligent in choosing when to play their instrument, not that they are incapable of playing beautifully.