The Status Game: On Human Life and How to Play It: On Social Position and How We Use it - Will Storr
What drives our political and moral beliefs? What makes us like some things and dislike others? What shapes how we behave, and misbehave, in groups? What makes you, you?
For centuries, philosophers and scholars have described human behaviour in terms of sex, power and money. In The Status Game, bestselling author Will Storr radically turns this thinking on its head by arguing that it is our irrepressible craving for status that ultimately defines who we are.
From the era of the hunter-gatherer to today, when we exist as workers in the globalised economy and citizens of online worlds, the need for status has always been wired into us. A wealth of research shows that how much of it we possess dramatically affects not only our happiness and well-being but also our physical health, and without sufficient status, we become more ill and live shorter lives. It’s an unconscious obsession that drives the best and worst of us: our innovation, arts and civilisation, as well as our murders, wars and genocides. But why is status such an all-consuming prize? What happens if it’s taken away from us? And how can our unquenchable thirst for it explain cults, moral panics, conspiracy theories, the rise of social media and the ‘culture wars’ of today?
On a breathtaking journey through time and culture, The Status Game offers a sweeping rethink of human psychology that will change how you see others – and how you see yourself.
The Three Types of Status Games
- Dominance Games: This is the most primitive form of status, achieved through force, fear, and intimidation. It's about compelling deference from others. Examples include mafias, armies, and authoritarian regimes.
- Virtue Games: In these games, status is awarded for demonstrating moral superiority, piety, and adherence to the group's rules and norms. Religions, charitable organisations, and social justice movements often operate as virtue games.
- Success Games: Status in these games is earned through competence, skill, and achievement. This is the realm of business, science, and sports, where status is granted based on tangible accomplishments.
Key Points
- Status is a Fundamental Need: Our well-being is deeply connected to our perceived status. High status is linked to better health, longer life, and greater happiness, while low status or a loss of status can lead to depression, anxiety, and even violence.
- Our Brains Construct a Status-Focused Reality: We don't perceive the world objectively. Instead, our brains create a "dream-like" reality that is heavily influenced by our desire for status. We are constantly, and often unconsciously, looking for cues about our own and others' social standing.
- Beliefs as Status Symbols: Our beliefs are not always the product of rational thought. Often, we adopt beliefs that will grant us status within our chosen groups. This is why challenging someone's beliefs can feel like a personal attack – it's a threat to their status and identity.
- The Dangers of the Status Game: The relentless pursuit of status can have a dark side. It can lead to envy, resentment, and a "zero-sum" mentality where one person's gain is another's loss. A significant loss of status, or "humiliation," is a powerful and destructive force that can be a catalyst for violence, from individual acts to mass atrocities.
- Social Media Amplifies the Game: Modern social media platforms have supercharged the status game, making it more visible, more competitive, and more anxiety-inducing than ever before. We are now playing the game on a global stage, with likes, shares, and followers as the new status symbols.
How to Play the Game
- Practice Warmth, Sincerity, and Competence: These qualities are universally valued and can help you gain "prestige," a form of status that is freely given rather than coerced.
- Make Small Moments of Prestige: You can give status to others by offering praise, showing respect, and allowing them to feel valued.
- Play a Hierarchy of Games: Don't invest all of your identity and self-worth in a single game. Diversifying your interests and social groups can make you more resilient to status fluctuations. Don't just try to be the best; try to be unique. Carving out your own niche can be a more effective and fulfilling way to gain status.
- Reduce Your Moral Sphere: Focus on your own behaviour rather than constantly judging others. This can help you avoid the trap of "virtue signalling" and moral grandstanding.
- Foster a Trade-Off Mindset: See the world in terms of complex trade-offs rather than simple winners and losers.
- Never Forget You're Dreaming: Remember that the status game is a social construct. The symbols of status we chase are often arbitrary. The goal is not to "win" but to find meaning and satisfaction in the process of playing.