07 September 2025

Turn Dismissiveness Around: Words that Command Respect - Jefferson Fisher

Learning Points

  • The nature of dismissive comments: Comments such as "it was just a joke," "don't take it so personally," or "don't be so sensitive" are attempts to dismiss your feelings, trivialise the consequences of what was said, and control the eventual outcome of a conversation. These remarks can gradually erode self-esteem and cause frustration.
  • Your right to decide the impact: You, as the recipient of a comment, are the sole individual who gets to decide what hurts you and what the consequence of a remark is; the person making the comment does not get to dictate that.
  • The ineffectiveness of defensiveness: Reacting defensively—by getting upset, scoffing, or visibly bristling—will make you appear weaker and inadvertently validate the dismissive comment. This can make it seem as though you are indeed exhibiting the behaviour they are accusing you of, such as being "sensitive".
  • The universality of sensitivity: It is important to understand that everyone possesses sensitivity; its expression is subjective and depends on the specific topic, context, and environment. Dismissing someone as "sensitive" is often a way for the speaker to evade responsibility for the impact of their words.

What to do When Someone Talks Over You - Jefferson Fisher

Learning Points

  • The impact of being talked over: When someone talks over you, the immediate reaction is often to stop talking, leading to a feeling of defeat and the interrupter dominating the conversation.
  • Ineffective responses to interruption: Trying to yell, gain more attention, or use sarcastic remarks (e.g., "Excuse me, am I interrupting you?") are the wrong approaches. Such actions make you appear desperate, put you in a weaker position, and look like you're grasping for control, which never works. Raising your voice to out-talk an interrupter only escalates the situation into a shouting match where no one genuinely listens or learns. This behaviour is merely a power grab for attention.
  • The power of maintaining composure: Continuing to talk with an even, controlled volume and pace, despite being interrupted, demonstrates that you are planted and grounded. This highlights a discrepancy where you appear controlled, while the interrupter appears to be grasping for attention, making them look weak.
  • The magnetic effect of one's own name: People have a natural affinity for the sound of their own name. Using someone's name is a powerful tool to snap their attention and create a window for you to re-enter or take control of the conversation.
  • Unconscious behaviour and establishing patterns: Sometimes, individuals may not realise they are talking over others. However, allowing this behaviour to continue unchallenged establishes a pattern where your opinion is perceived as less important than theirs. It's crucial to address it immediately.

You Need to Be Bored. Here's Why - Arthur Brooks

Boredom isn’t a bug—it’s a feature. Harvard professor Arthur Brooks explains why boredom unlocks creativity, activates a powerful brain network, and might even protect you from depression. Learn how the mind wanders—and why that’s a very good thing.

Understanding Boredom and its Importance

  • Boredom is not merely an absence of activity; it triggers the brain's default mode network (DMN). The DMN activates when your mind is not otherwise occupied, allowing for deeper thought.
  • While often perceived as uncomfortable, this DMN activation prompts reflection on existential questions, such as the meaning of life, which is described as "incredibly important, incredibly good".
  • Many people actively dislike boredom, to the extent that some participants in an experiment chose to administer painful electric shocks rather than sit in silence for 15 minutes.
  • Modern society has significantly reduced opportunities for boredom, primarily through the constant use of mobile devices, which effectively "shut off" the default mode network.
  • The continuous avoidance of boredom creates a "doom loop of meaning," making it harder for individuals to find purpose in their lives and contributing to increased rates of depression, anxiety, and a sense of hollowness.
  • Embracing boredom can lead to more interesting ideas and enhance your "skill of boredom," making you feel less bored with routine aspects of life like your job or relationships.
  • Crucially, allowing for boredom helps you delve into profound life questions concerning purpose, meaning, coherence, and significance, potentially leading to greater happiness.

02 September 2025

Missing the learning from errors of omission - Modern Wisdom

Humans have an asymmetry of errors. We over-index exceptions - we use things that break the pattern we’ve come to expect as a serious learning opportunity. But we tend to only learn much faster from errors of commission (things we do), not errors of omission (things we don’t do).

  • You only learn the sting of misplaced trust when someone betrays you, but when you refuse to trust and miss out on love, partnership, or help, the loss leaves no scar to remind you.
  • It’s obvious when quitting for a new career turns out to be a mistake; it’s far less obvious when staying put quietly drains years of your life that you’ll never get back.

01 September 2025

Communicate with Confidence: The Blueprint for Mastering Every Conversation - Mel Robbins with Jefferson Fisher

The YouTube video, featuring trial lawyer Jefferson Fisher and host Mel Robbins, provides actionable strategies and insights into mastering communication to improve all aspects of life, from personal relationships to professional interactions. The core message is that what you say is who you are, and the power to communicate effectively can change everything you want about your life.

1. The Foundational Power of Your Words

  • Your Words Define You: For the vast majority of people, their entire personality is compressed into what others hear them say. People experience who you are almost entirely through your words and how they make them feel. You cannot be a kind person if you do not say kind things; similarly, rude behaviour is perceived through disliked words.
  • Anyone Can Learn: It doesn't matter if you're shy or an introvert; anyone can learn to be a better communicator. More words do not necessarily equal better communication; often, you can say a lot with less.
  • Practical and Relatable: The advice offered is practical, not hypothetical, stemming from real-world conflicts and interactions, making it highly relatable. Jefferson Fisher's tips are short, concise, and applicable to improving the next conversation.

31 August 2025

Cognitive Biases

Cognitive biases are systematic patterns of deviation from norm or rationality in judgment. They are mental shortcuts, or heuristics, that the brain uses to simplify information processing and make decisions more quickly. While often useful, these biases can lead to distorted perceptions of reality and flawed decision-making. Here's a summary of 20 common cognitive biases and their effects on how we perceive our environment and make choices.

Biases Affecting Belief and Information Processing

These biases influence how we seek out, interpret, and recall information, often reinforcing our existing beliefs.

  • Confirmation Bias: The tendency to search for, interpret, favor, and recall information that confirms or supports one's preexisting beliefs or hypotheses. This affects our decision-making by causing us to selectively gather evidence, leading to skewed perspectives and poor choices. For instance, an investor might only seek out news that is positive about a stock they own, ignoring any negative indicators.
  • Anchoring Bias: The over-reliance on the first piece of information offered when making decisions. This initial "anchor" influences subsequent judgments. In negotiations, the first price suggested often sets the stage for the rest of the discussion, and in everyday life, the initial price we see for a product can make subsequent, lower prices seem like a better deal than they actually are.
  • Availability Heuristic: Overestimating the importance of information that is most readily available to us. Events that are more recent, vivid, or emotionally charged are more easily recalled and thus perceived as being more common or likely to occur. For example, after hearing several news reports about a plane crash, you might feel that air travel is more dangerous than it statistically is.

25 August 2025

Personal Change and Social Resistance - Modern Wisdom

“You are a different character in the mind of each person who knows you, because their impression of you is made of the bare bones of what they’ve seen, fleshed out by their knowledge of themselves.” - Gurwinder Bhogal

The Lonely Chapter has another perspective to it - as you grow, you don’t fit in with your friends, but this means that your friends don’t fit in with you either, and this causes a reaction from their side too.

The hardest part of changing yourself isn’t just improving your habits, it’s escaping the people who keep handing you your old costume.

Others don’t just remember who you were, they enforce it - which is why reinvention so often feels like trying to break out of a prison you can’t see.

Psychologists call this dynamic an Object Relation.

When people interact with you, they’re not engaging with you in your full, living complexity.

They’re dealing with the version of you that exists in their head, a simplified character built from fragments of memory and coloured by their own projections.

23 August 2025

IF Kipling Played Golf

IF Kipling Played Golf

If you can dream of breaking par,
And master that dream by not then topping it off the first tee;

If you can wait, and not be tired by waiting,
For the slow foursome playing up ahead;

Or hearing lies, not give yourself to stating,
Your partner’s six was actually an eight;

If you can meet with Birdie and Disaster
(A 20 foot putt versus a ball lost in the trees),
And treat those two impostors just the same;

If you can trust your read when others doubt you,
And still two-putt, as you were meant to do;

If you can watch the swing you spent all winter perfecting,
Break apart and lose its flame,
And build it back by thinking “soft hands, weight left, body rotation”;

Then yours is the Course and everything that’s in it,
And, what's more, you’ll be a True Golfer, my friend!

© Parwinder Sekhon August 2025

22 August 2025

Dating Essentials For Men - Dr Robert Glover

Dating Essentials For Men - Dr Robert Glover

For most of his life, Dr Glover, the author of the groundbreaking No More Mr Nice Guy, was what he calls a "bad dater." He assumed the women he wanted were not interested in him. He believed that women disliked sex and thought men who wanted sex were bad. When he did get a girlfriend by practicing what he calls "Nice Guy Seduction," he typically hung on way too long for fear of having to enter the dating world all over again. But this all changed when he got divorced in his mid-forties. Dr Glover decided to approach dating as if it were a scientific experiment. To his surprise, he quickly found that talking with women, getting numbers, and getting laid was nowhere as difficult as he had thought. He often wondered what planet he had landed on.

Dating Essentials for Men was born of this experiment. Dr Glover has since taught thousands of men how to interact confidently with women and find the love and sex they have been seeking.

Are you ready to let go of the games, the tricks, the seduction, the pickup, the negs, the cocky-funny routines, the buying women drinks, the volunteering to help their sister move? Do you want to learn how to create the kind of authentic attraction that naturally brings women to you? If so, Dating Essentials for Men is the only dating guide you will ever need.

07 August 2025

How to Control Your Cortisol & Overcome Burnout - Dr Andrew Huberman

In this episode, I explain cortisol and science-based protocols for properly setting your cortisol rhythm, which can significantly increase your daytime energy, focus, mood, and stress resilience, while also improving your sleep quality. Most people mistakenly think cortisol is bad, and many assume their levels are too high, when in fact many health and performance challenges simply stem from a disrupted cortisol rhythm. Getting your cortisol rhythm right can be transformative for your health and performance. I outline behavioural, nutritional, and supplement-based strategies to raise or lower your cortisol levels at the appropriate times of day and night. I also provide specific protocols for overcoming burnout. If you’re dealing with stress, low energy, hormone or sleep challenges, or simply want to optimise these for the sake of your physical and mental health and performance, this episode offers science-backed protocols to help.

Introduction to Cortisol and Burnout

Cortisol is a powerful lever for overall health and well-being, impacting mood, sleep, the immune system, and long-term well-being. While commonly associated with stress, cortisol's primary role is to deploy and direct energy to tissues, particularly the brain, for various demands, not just stressors. It releases glucose (blood sugar) into the bloodstream from the liver and muscles to provide this energy. Cortisol is produced in the adrenal glands and operates on a slightly slower timescale than adrenaline/epinephrine. Unlike adrenaline, cortisol is lipophilic, allowing it to cross the blood-brain barrier and act on receptors in the brain, especially in the hippocampus, which is crucial for memory. Burnout is a real condition, and understanding cortisol's role is key to addressing it. The goal is to achieve a high cortisol early in the day and low cortisol before and during sleep. If this rhythm is corrected, it can resolve issues like morning anxiety, low energy, and sleep difficulties associated with burnout. There are two main patterns of burnout: being stressed in the morning and exhausted in the afternoon, or being stressed at night and exhausted in the morning.

The Cortisol Rhythm and Its Regulation

06 August 2025

I Hate The Way We Apologize - Charisma on Command

The Problem with Apologies

Public apologies are often perceived as insincere and forced, made under pressure to protect one's career, income, and social status. These apologies frequently do not lead to genuine feelings of improvement or significant change, and are often criticised as "phony Hollywood apology videos". The video highlights instances where public figures like Will Smith, Logan Paul, Kanye West, and Kevin Spacey made apologies under pressure, only to later contradict or disown them once the pressure subsided.

This issue extends beyond public figures into private life, where "fake apologies" are given and received, leading to no growth, empathy, or repair, effectively making them as useless as no apology at all.

Shame as the Core Issue

According to Joe Hudson, the fundamental problem with most ineffective apologies is shame. He explains that children are often taught to apologize by being told to do so, which makes it a transfer of shame, akin to a "shame hot potato".

The video uses the Will Smith slapping incident as a detailed example of this "shame hot potato" cycle:

  • Chris Rock's joke about Jada causes Jada to feel shame.
  • Will Smith, observing Jada's reaction, fears getting the "shame hot potato" for being a perceived bad partner.
  • Will then unloads this shame onto Chris Rock by slapping him.
  • Subsequently, social media places the shame back on Will (and Jada).
  • A year later, Chris Rock, through his comedy special, redirects the shame back at Will and Jada.

The video argues that when society deeply shames individuals, it makes it more probable that the problematic behaviour will continue, as people either avoid the situation or perpetuate the behaviour, rather than transforming it.

17 July 2025

How To Reverse Insulin Resistance Through Diet, Exercise & Sleep - Found My Fitness with Dr Ben Bikman

Insulin Resistance: A Common Root Cause of Chronic Disease

Dr. Ben Bikman, a professor of cell biology, advocates the view that insulin resistance is a common root cause for most chronic diseases. It is implicated in type 2 diabetes, obesity, Alzheimer's, fatty liver disease, infertility, and even breast and prostate cancers. Insulin is a powerful hormone that affects virtually every cell in the body. Rather than treating individual diseases as separate issues, Dr. Bikman suggests addressing insulin resistance as a "common soil hypothesis" to simplify the clinical approach. This perspective highlights that insulin resistance is not the sole contributor to these conditions but is an undeniable factor.

Limitations of the Glucose-Centric Medical Paradigm

Modern clinical care often operates under a "glucose-centric paradigm," focusing primarily on blood glucose levels to monitor metabolic health. However, this approach can miss the early stages of insulin resistance. Insulin resistance is characterised by elevated insulin levels, where the body works harder to keep glucose in check, often maintaining normal glucose levels initially. Because glucose remains normal, this early phase of insulin resistance often "flies under the clinical radar". Dr. Bikman argues that if insulin levels were routinely measured, the earliest signs of metabolic problems could be detected sooner, allowing for earlier intervention. Ignoring high insulin levels can also lead to treatments, such as giving insulin therapy to type 2 diabetics, which may control glucose but can paradoxically "kill them faster" due to hyperinsulinemia and worsening insulin resistance.

Detecting Insulin Resistance

08 July 2025

Navigating bone health: early life influences & strategies for improvement & injury prevention - Peter Attia

In this episode from July 2022, Peter delves into the topic of bone health, explaining why it is an important issue for everyone, from children to the elderly. He begins with an overview of bone mineral density, how it’s measured, how it changes throughout life, and the variability between sexes, largely due to changes in estrogen levels. From there, he provides insights into ways to improve bone health, including exercise, nutrition supplements, and medications. Additionally, Peter discusses what happens when one is forced to be sedentary (e.g., bed rest) and how to minimise the damage during these periods.

While this original episode is an AMA, it is available in full to all listeners as a special rebroadcast.

01 July 2025

How To Live Freely In A Goal-Obsessed World - Modern Wisdom with Anne-Laure Le Cunff

Anne‑Laure Le Cunff is a neuroscientist, founder, and author. 

We live by unconscious mental scripts. Most of the time, we don’t even realize it, until we wake up and see the life we’re living isn’t what we truly want. So how do we unlearn what no longer serves us and rewire our mind to align with who we really are?

Expect to learn what the problem is when people obsess over finding their purpose, how to know if you’re following your own dreams or someone else’s,  the tactics you can learn to begin unlearning cultural scripts, how to get more comfortable with uncertainty, how to deal with the shame of letting go of busyness and driving toward your purpose, why posture is so overlooked in mental health, how to improve a destructive mindset, and much more…

Feminism Debate - The Diary of a CEO with Deborah France-White, Louise Perry, and Erica Komisa

Has modern feminism betrayed the very women it promised to empower? Deborah France-White (Guilty Feminist), Louise Perry, and Erica Komisar go head-to-head on sexual freedom.

Deborah Frances-White is a bestselling author and host of The Guilty Feminist podcast, Louise Perry is a journalist and author of The Case Against the Sexual Revolution, and Erica Komisar is a clinical social worker, psychoanalyst, and author of books such as, ‘Chicken Little the Sky Isn't Falling: Raising Resilient Adolescents in the New Age of Anxiety’.

In this heated debate, they discuss:
  • What casual sex is really doing to women.
  • Why relationships are declining.
  • The parenting crisis that no one’s talking about.
  • Why fewer people are having children.
  • How modern dating is affecting female self-worth.

18 June 2025

How to Make Time for Everything and Then Actually Do It - Ali Abdaal

This video, presented by Ali Abdaal, addresses the common question of how to make time for everything, utilizing a "168 hours" spreadsheet to illustrate time allocation within a week.

Part 1: Analysis of Average American Time Use

The first part of the video uses data from sources like the American Time Use Survey, Nielsen data, and research conducted by AI tools (ChatGPT, Claude) to estimate how the average American spends their 168 hours per week.

  • Sleep: On average, Americans sleep approximately 8.7 hours per night, which equates to 56 hours per week. Including 30 minutes for winding down before sleep, the total time dedicated to sleep-related activities is 59.5 hours per week (about 35% of life).
  • Work: An average 8-hour workday, five days a week, combined with a 30-minute lunch break, a 30-minute commute each way, 45 minutes for getting ready, and 15 minutes for changing after work, totals 52.5 hours per week (about 31.3% of life).
  • Food: Eating and preparing meals (breakfast, lunch, dinner) consume an average of 12 hours per week. Grocery shopping adds another 60 minutes weekly.
  • Chores: Tasks such as cleaning, laundry, and other miscellaneous chores account for roughly 6.5 hours per week, though this is noted as potentially an underestimate and varies greatly, especially with children.
  • Fitness: The average American allocates about 2.5 hours per week to fitness and exercise.
  • Entertainment: This category is substantial, with the average American spending 19 hours a week watching TV shows, movies, and streaming content (including YouTube). An additional 3.5 hours per week are spent on social media apps, though for 18-24 year olds, this jumps to 5.1 hours *per day*. Other entertainment like gaming (1 hour) and general entertainment (6 hours) further contribute to this total, reaching 29.5 hours per week.
  • Relationships: Time for quality family and partner interactions (3 hours) and general socialising (1 hour) are also factored in.

12 June 2025

Rethinking Mental Health: What The Science Actually Says About Depression, The Side Effects of Antidepressants & Finding Balance - Dr Rangan Chatterjee with Prof Joanna Moncrieff

Did you know that nearly one in five UK adults – and almost one in four women – are currently taking antidepressants? Yet according to my guest this week, the fundamental theory behind these prescriptions may be built on remarkably shaky ground.

Joanna Moncrieff is Professor of Critical and Social Psychiatry at University College London, a consultant psychiatrist for the NHS, and the author of the groundbreaking book, Chemically Imbalanced: The Making and Unmaking of the Serotonin Myth.

In our thought-provoking conversation, Joanna explains how the widely accepted belief that depression is caused by a chemical imbalance or serotonin deficiency has little scientific evidence to support it. This theory, which became popularised in the 1990s through pharmaceutical industry marketing, has fundamentally changed how we view our emotions and mental health.

10 June 2025

Jordan Peterson’s Worst Debate - What Went Wrong? - Charisma on Command

Jordan Peterson has delivered some of the internet’s most iconic debate moments. But his Surrounded video doesn’t quite reach that same level.

Many will dissect the substance of the debate—the semantic haze, the definitions, the back-and-forth. That’s not where I want to focus.

What matters most in a debate, if your goal is to actually change someone’s mind, isn’t clever semantics, gotcha moments, or even airtight logic. It’s the emotional connection you build through rapport and charisma. That human link is what opens the door to real persuasion.

08 June 2025

How To Fix Your Brain’s Addiction To Anxiety & Worry - Modern Wisdom with Dr Russell Kennedy

Dr. Russell Kennedy is a neuroscientist specialising in anxiety treatment, a physician, and an author.

Why is anxiety so common now? It once helped us survive, like when lions chased us. But today, we feel it even when there's no real threat. So what's going on? What does science say about this ancient emotion, and how can we manage it in the modern world?

Expect to learn why anxiety is so common nowadays, the neuroscience of why we worry, the big differences between anxiety and worry, the biggest triggers of anxiety and how to manage them better, how to undo-chronic anxiety and how anxiety shows up differently for men and women, if it is it a blessing or a curse to feel things deeply, where people pleasing come from neurologically and much more…

Chris Williamson Explains Why Finding Love Feels Harder Than Ever - The Diary of a CEO with Chris Williamson

In todays moments episode, Chris Williamson dives into why real relationships seem harder to find in today’s world - and what you can do about it. With the challenges of modern dating, and the rise of disconnection, Chris offers a hopeful perspective on how to navigate these hurdles and create deeper, more meaningful connections in your life.

23 May 2025

This Masculine Trait (Containment, Empathetic Attunement and Grounding Someone) Naturally Attracts Women - Charisma on Command

I used to think being attractive was all about confidence, teasing, and strong body language, but I was missing something deeper. In this video, I break down the 3 traits of grounded masculinity that most men overlook. These traits make women feel emotionally safe, connected, and irresistibly drawn in.

0:00 – Why Typical Attraction Advice Falls Short
2:39 – Containment: The Balance Between Holding Space and Setting Limits
4:18 – Empathetic Attunement: Feeling Without Getting Lost
7:08 – Grounding Someone in the Now (Not the Logic)

10 May 2025

Here's How to Get to the Top 1% (Discipline Isn’t Enough) - Ali Abdaal with Joe Hudson

Everyone wonders how to reach the top 1%; most people think it's all about discipline and hard work. In this video, I'm sharing the deeper success habits I've learned from Joe Hudson that go beyond typical productivity advice. These principles have transformed my life this past year, and I hope they help you too..

1. Prioritise Pace over Perfection (The Iterative Mindset)

Instead of getting bogged down in meticulous planning and waiting for everything to be perfect, highly successful individuals focus on taking action with minimal preparation (around 20%) and then iterating based on feedback. The pace of movement is considered more important than getting it absolutely right initially because it accelerates learning and allows for necessary adjustments. A common barrier to action is the fear of making public mistakes. This habit aligns with an "Ready Fire Aim" approach.

06 May 2025

Contracts of Love & Money That Make or Break Relationships - Dr Andrew Huberman with James Sexton

My guest is James Sexton, Esq., a renowned attorney specializing in contracts related to love and money—prenuptial agreements, divorce and custody. We explore the counterintuitive fact that people with prenuptial agreements tend to stay married longer and report more satisfying relationships than those who don’t. We discuss how legal contracts can foster deeper understanding by encouraging vulnerability and honest communication about each partner’s values and expectations.

We also examine what defines true, lasting love versus generic romantic ideals—and how social media can distort our understanding of what we truly need. Additionally, we review how cultural traditions, gender dynamics, courtship length, and age at the time of marriage shape marital outcomes.

This episode offers practical tools for anyone—single or partnered—to build more successful and stable relationships through deeply honest dialogue and contracts that reflect genuine values around love and money.

09 April 2025

Toxic Compassion and Performative Empathy - Modern Wisdom

Toxic Compassion is the prioritisation of short-term emotional comfort over everything else.

Over truth, reality, actual long-term outcomes, flourishing, everything.

It optimises for looking good, rather than doing good.

This is seen in much of popular culture as the desirable, fair, empathetic thing to do.

And it’s everywhere.

21 March 2025

The Art Of Effortless Confidence & Social Persuasion - Modern Wisdom with Vanessa Van Edwards

Vanessa Van Edwards is a behavioral researcher, speaker, and author.

How do you make a great first impression? How can I become more charismatic? How can I stop feeling awkward in social situations? We've all wondered about these things at some point. Luckily, Vanessa is an expert on human interaction and has the answers you're looking for.

Expect to learn what we should do without hands in social situations, the 4 key things you should do when prepping for a speech, the do’s and don’ts when you’re sitting down, how to detect a liar & how to become a better liar, why so many smart people struggle to be charismatic, how to get better at small talk, how to seem more attractive when dating, how to make the best first impression possible and much more…

Beautiful vs. Practical Advice - The Morgan Housel Podcast

I heard a phrase recently: “Magazine architect”. It’s a derisive term architects use for their colleagues who design buildings that look beautiful, grace magazine covers, and win awards, but lack functionality for the tenants. The same is true for financial professionals. If you are looking for practical advice, beware hiring an artist whose goal is to be praised.

"Beautiful" financial advice is often complex, sounds sophisticated, and may be designed to generate high fees for advisors. In contrast, "practical" advice is often simple, boring, and may not sound as exciting, but it is effective in meeting an individual's financial goals. An example of practical advice is investing in low-cost index funds.

The Danger of Advice That "Sounds Good". People are often drawn to advice that sounds good because it promises a secret or a shortcut to wealth. However, this type of advice is often the most dangerous in the long run. Avoid chasing "hot" investments and instead focus on a more measured and sensible approach.

The Importance of Personalised Advice. There is no one-size-fits-all solution in finance. Financial advice that is beneficial for one person could be detrimental to another. Because of these individual differences, there is a tendency to gravitate towards advice that sounds the most intelligent, rather than what is most practical for a specific person's situation.

Advisor Incentives vs. Client Needs. There is a potential conflict of interest where financial professionals may be more motivated by their own career advancement and compensation than by the actual needs of their clients. This can lead them to recommend "beautiful" but unsuitable financial products.

The Beauty of Simplicity. Morgan Housel, reveals that his own personal finances are simple and "boring." They are not designed to win awards but are practical and effective for his family's needs. This highlights the idea that there is a certain "beauty" in practicality and simplicity.

Focus on Timeless Principles. Rather than trying to predict future market trends, which is nearly impossible, focus on the aspects of human behavior and finance that do not change. Understanding timeless principles like greed, fear, and risk will serve investors better in the long run.

07 March 2025

Fierce Intimacy - The Five Losing Strategies in Partner Relationships - Terry Real

For this episode, I’m doing something a bit different. I’m featuring five chapters from Terry Real's audiobook Fierce Intimacy. What you will hear in this episode will help you identify your and your partner’s losing strategies in relationships and help you move from disharmony to repair. Terry is the creator of Relational Life Therapy, or RLT, which underpins all his books, courses, and teachings and equips people with the powerful relational skills they need to make love work. 

The Five Losing Strategies: Recognising the Pitfalls

According to Real, couples often unconsciously adopt these five detrimental approaches during disagreements:

1. Being Right: This strategy involves a relentless need to prove your own perspective as the objective truth, effectively turning a discussion into a courtroom drama where one partner must be vindicated and the other proven wrong.

  • Key Learning: The pursuit of being "right" is a hollow victory in a relationship. It prioritizes individual ego over the well-being of the partnership. In intimate connections, subjective experiences matter more than objective facts.

  • Action Point: Shift your focus from "who's right" to "what can we do to solve this together?" Practice active listening to understand your partner's perspective, even if you don't agree with it. Acknowledge the validity of their feelings.

03 March 2025

Becoming Bulletproof - The Diary of a CEO with Evy Poumpouras

Evy Poumpouras is a former Special Agent with the U.S. Secret Service. She is the author of the bestselling book, ‘Becoming Bulletproof: Protect Yourself, Read People, Influence Situations, Live Fearlessly’ and co-host of Bravo’s TV competition series ‘Spy Games’.

How to Enhance Your Immune System - Dr Andrew Huberman with Dr Roger Seheult

My guest is Dr. Roger Seheult, M.D., a board-certified physician in internal medicine, pulmonary diseases, critical care, and sleep medicine at Loma Linda University. We discuss the powerful benefits of light therapy, including infrared light, red light, and sunlight, for improving mitochondrial function in all the body’s organs. We also explore ways to reduce the risk of influenza, colds, and other illnesses that affect the lungs, sinuses, and gut.

Topics include the flu shot, whether handwashing truly prevents illness transmission, and treatments for mold toxicity. We review the efficacy of N-acetylcysteine (NAC), the power of hydrotherapy for combating infections, and strategies for improving sleep and overall health. Additionally, we discuss air quality. This episode provides actionable, science-based tools for preventing and treating infectious illnesses.

The Secret Habits Of Supercommunicators - Modern Wisdom with Charles Duhigg

Effective communication is the foundation of any strong relationship. While some excel at it naturally, others struggle to express themselves and often get misunderstood. So, what are the best tips to become a master communicator and elevate your communication skills?

Expect to learn what most people get wrong when it comes to understanding communication, the biggest differences between communicators and supercommunicators, how introverts and extroverts communicate differently, the best and worst ways to communicate as a couple, how to be more charismatic, how to get better as making good decisions and much more…

What Traits Should You Look For In A Partner? - Modern Wisdom with Dr Shannon Curry

Modern adult relationships are complicated. With endless talk of red flags, green flags, icks etc., it can be tough to know who’s truly worth your time. So how do you build a lasting, healthy relationship when you're ready for one?

Expect to learn what the biggest red flags are to look out for in a partner, the green flags you should look for, the most common reasons why relationships fail, how to see the beauty instead of the challenges in your partner, how you can unlearn the way you argue, how to create longevity in a relationship, the best advice for stopping intrusive thoughts or unwanted worries about your partner, how to move on from heartbreak, and much more…

25 January 2025

Minimum Levels of Stress - The Morgan Housel Podcast

Most people, and definitely society as a whole, seem to have a minimum level of stress. They will never be fully at ease because after solving every problem the gaze of their anxiety shifts to the next problem, no matter how trivial it is relative to previous ones.

24 January 2025

Non violent communication summary

"Nonviolent Communication" by Marshall Rosenberg is a communication framework that fosters empathy, understanding, and peaceful resolution in conflicts. It can be summarised with the following key concepts:

  • Language of Life: NVC emphasizes using language that connects rather than separates. It focuses on expressing needs and feelings honestly while also empathically understanding the needs of others.
  • Four Components: NVC communication involves four key components:
    • Observations: Stating facts without judgment or evaluation.
    • Feelings: Identifying and expressing your genuine feelings related to the situation.
    • Needs: Recognizing the underlying needs that give rise to your feelings.
    • Requests: Making clear and specific requests to address your needs.
  • Empathy: NVC emphasizes the importance of truly listening to and understanding the other person's perspective, including their observations, feelings, and needs.
  • Compassion: NVC promotes a compassionate approach to communication, recognizing that everyone is doing the best they can with the resources they have.

23 January 2025

9 Harsh Truths About How Relationships Work - Modern Wisdom with Jillian Turecki

Jillian Turecki is a relationship coach, teacher, writer and author. How do you create a thriving and loving relationship that truly lasts? While many may stumble into one by chance, building a deep and meaningful connection often requires more than luck. So what role does the inner work play in not just finding love, but building a relationship that continues to grow and flourish over time? Expect to learn why having a thriving relationship begins with self-work, why the mind is a battlefield in relationships, why lust is not the same as love, the critical reasons it's important to love yourself properly, why you can’t convince someone to love you, why it's important to make peace with your parents and how to do so, and much more…

13 January 2025

Living Your Best Year Ever - Darren Hardy

This PDF documents the system Darren Hardy has used for more than 25 years to design, stick to and achieve his own big goals.

A hard-copy can be bought here.

Goal Setting and Planning

  • The Importance of "Why": Your "Why Power" is more important than willpower. It is the internal drive that will motivate you to achieve your goals.
  • Vision: Having a clear vision for your life is essential. Your vision should be bigger than yourself and something you are willing to fight for.
  • Written Goals: Clearly written goals with specific plans are necessary for success. Goals should be written down; "the weakest ink is stronger than the strongest mind".
  • SMART Goals: Ensure your goals are Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Time-sensitive.
  • Balanced Goals: Goals should be balanced across different areas of life, not just focused on one area: health, relationships, business/work, interests/experiences/hobbies.
  • Prioritise Goals: Prioritise your goals into the top three for the year.
  • Plan of Action: Create a strategic plan of action, with precise instructions for your mind to unlock your potential. Calculate your timeline. Map your route with milestones. Consider who else is impacted. Identify who you need for assistance. Determine what research is needed.
  • Commitment: Make a firm commitment to the process and sign the commitment pledge. Commitment is like pregnancy; you either are or aren't.
  • Don't Wait: Start now; the time will never be just right.

8 Hidden Habits To Live Your Healthiest, Happiest and Most Fulfilled Life - Dr Rangan Chatterjee with Robin Sharma

In our conversation, we explore Robin’s concept of the ‘eight forms of wealth’, including physical and mental wellness, rich family relationships, fulfilling work and strong community connections. We discuss why traditional self-help approaches often fall short, particularly in the realm of personal growth and happiness, and how society’s obsession with hustle culture and toxic positivity has exacerbated the problem of burnout and dissatisfaction.

03 January 2025

The Dopamine Expert - The Diary of a CEO with Dr Anna Lembke

Dr Anna Lembke is Professor of Psychiatry at Stanford University School of Medicine and chief of the Stanford Addiction Medicine Dual Diagnosis Clinic. She is the author of bestselling books such as, ‘Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence’

10 December 2024

The Body Language Expert - The Diary of a CEO with Vanessa Van Edwards

Vanessa Van Edwards is the founder of ‘Science of People’, which gives people science-backed skills to improve communication and leadership. She is also the bestselling author of ‘Captivate: The Science of Succeeding with People’ and ‘Cues: Master the Secret Language of Charismatic Communication'.

26 November 2024

How the Pill Changes Everything: Your Brain on Birth Control - The Diary of a CEO with Dr Sarah Hill

Spotify

Spotify

From sabotaging sex to axing attraction, new research is showing that the birth control pill can have impacts you never imagined. Dr Sarah Hill is a renowned evolutionary social psychologist who focuses on women and health. She is also the author of How the Pill Changes Everything: Your Brain on Birth Control.

The Psychological Impact of Hormonal Birth Control (HBC)

  • Dr. Sarah Hill's interest in researching HBC stems from her personal experience of feeling a profound "waking up" approximately three months after discontinuing it, noting increased energy, libido, interest in men, and engagement in activities like downloading new music.
  • Her mission is to empower women by providing scientific insights into how hormones, particularly HBC, influence their self-perception, relationships, and societal roles, emphasising that this conversation is relevant for everyone – women, their partners, and those who love women.
  • HBC has been crucial for women's political and economic independence through recent history, enabling greater planning for education and careers by ensuring they can finish programmes without interruption due to pregnancy.

Natural Hormonal Cycles and Their Influence

  • Women's natural ovulatory cycles involve predictable fluctuations of ovarian hormones, primarily estrogen (estradiol) and progesterone, which profoundly impact brain structure, function, mood, and behaviour. The brain is a plastic organism that changes its structure and function throughout the cycle.
  • During the periovulatory phase (typically days 9-14/15 of a 28-day cycle), high estrogen levels lead to increased sexual desire, more frequent sexual behaviour, and a heightened preference for masculine cues (e.g., masculinised male faces, voices, testosterone scent) in potential partners, as the body prepares for conception. This phase is generally associated with feeling sexy and energetic.
  • Conversely, during the luteal phase (after ovulation), progesterone dominance is associated with decreased sexual interest, increased sleepiness, hunger, and sometimes moodiness, as the body shifts its focus to potential embryo implantation.
  • It is a misconception that women are more "hormonal" than men; everyone's behaviour and mood are influenced by hormones. Men's testosterone levels also fluctuate dynamically and unpredictably throughout the day and in response to various environmental and social cues (e.g., time of day, relationship status, presence of attractive women, competitive events, even the presence of weapons).
  • The idea that sex differences are purely culturally imprinted is considered disempowering for women, suggesting they are passive products of patriarchy rather than having an evolved "female nature" shaped by inherited evolution and wisdom from successful ancestors.

18 November 2024

Some differences between male and female university professors in America - Modern Wisdom with Cory Clark

“71% of men reported that protecting free speech is more important than promoting an inclusive society; 59% of women said promoting an inclusive society is more important than protecting free speech.

56% of men said that colleges should not protect students from offensive ideas; 64% of women said that they should.

51% of men said colleges should not disinvite speakers if students threaten violent protest; 67% of women said they should.

58% of men opposed a confidential reporting system at colleges which students could use to report offensive comments; 54% of women supported it.

13 November 2024

Functional Dentist: New Research Linking Dental Hygiene To Many Other Diseases - The Diary of a CEO with Dr Victoria Sampson

Dr Victoria Sampson is an award-winning functional dentist, researcher, and founder of the multidisciplinary oral health centre, The Health Society Labs. She is also the first dentist in the world to link gum disease with worse COVID complications.

19 October 2024

Britain's race problem: what politicians aren't telling you about multiculturalism - Trevor Philips

Is the phrase ‘white privilege’ increasingly out of touch? The received mainstream wisdom has generally described Britain as a white majority society in which the non-white community are invariably oppressed, discriminated against or overlooked. But a new report from the think tank Policy Exchange paints a complicated picture of multicultural Britain, showing that, actually, the experiences of ethnic minorities can’t all be grouped into one, ‘non-white’ label. In fact, minorities such as British-Indians and the British-Chinese consistently outperform the white majority, even those who are wealthier.

In this no-holds-barred interview, the broadcaster and author Trevor Phillips talks to The Spectator’s assistant editor Cindy Yu about race in modern Britain. What do the summer’s riots tell us about the real problems of integration in this country? Is the right better at dealing with the nuances of race and class than the left? And why is it that the white majority are increasingly left behind?

14 October 2024

Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less - Greg Mckeown

Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less - Greg Mckeown

Have you ever found yourself struggling with information overload?

Have you ever felt both overworked and underutilised?

Do you ever feel busy but not productive?

If you answered yes to any of these, the way out is to become an Essentialist.

In Essentialism, Greg McKeown, CEO of a Leadership and Strategy agency in Silicon Valley who has run courses at Apple, Google and Facebook, shows you how to achieve what he calls the disciplined pursuit of less. Being an Essentialist is about a disciplined way of thinking. It means challenging the core assumption of ‘We can have it all’ and ‘I have to do everything’ and replacing it with the pursuit of ‘the right thing, in the right way, at the right time'.

By applying more selective criteria for what is essential, the pursuit of less allows us to regain control of our choices so we can channel our time, energy and effort into making the highest possible contribution toward the goals and activities that matter.

Using the experience and insight of working with the leaders of the world's most innovative companies and organisations, McKeown shows you how to put Essentialism into practice in your own life, so you too can achieve something great.

Essentialism is a systematic approach to focusing on what's truly important by eliminating non-essential activities and commitments. It's about doing fewer things, but doing them better, making the wisest possible investment of your time and energy to achieve maximum results.

Key Principles

  1. Explore and Evaluate: Carefully assess opportunities, recognizing that not everything is equally important.
  2. Eliminate: Ruthlessly cut out non-essential tasks, activities, and commitments that don't align with core goals.
  3. Execute: Create systematic routines and practices that make executing essential tasks easier and more effective.

Main Ideas

  • Most people try to do too much, spreading themselves thin
  • Success comes from strategically choosing where to focus energy
  • Learn to say "no" to non-essential commitments
  • Prioritize tasks that create the most significant impact
  • Create space for meaningful work by removing unnecessary obligations

Practical Strategies

  • Conduct regular personal and professional audits of time and commitments
  • Develop the skill of gracefully declining requests that don't align with core objectives
  • Design intentional systems that protect time for essential work
  • Recognize trade-offs and make deliberate choices about where to invest energy

07 October 2024

The Unstoppable Power Of Reframing Your Experiences - Modern Wisdom with Derek Sivers

Derek Sivers is an entrepreneur, author, and speaker. Tony Robbins once famously asked, “How can the worst thing that ever happened to you become the best thing?” This highlights the power of reframing. By changing your perspective on life events—whether they’re objectively true or not—what matters is their usefulness. If a perspective serves you positively, it works, and that’s the real power of perspective. Expect to learn how you can reframe your perspective for the better, what the term ‘Useful Not True’ means, why your thoughts cannot be trusted nor should you believe each one that pops into your head, why people don’t bond over facts but rather perspectives, how to not become discouraged if you are thrown off course, how to make better decisions and make the best choice possible and much more...

01 October 2024

Why Do Humans Actually Have Emotions? - Modern Wisdom with Dr Laith Al-Shawaf

Dr Laith Al-Shawaf is an evolutionary psychology researcher and Associate Professor in the Department of Psychology at UCCS. Humans have a wide range of emotions. But why do we feel anything at all? Why do we actually have emotions and how did they come about? Expect to learn why humans evolved to have emotions, whether some emotions are more basic than others, evolutionary explanations for joy, anger, disgust, envy, awe, happiness and much more…

25 September 2024

The New Science Of The Body Clock: How To Boost Your Immune System, Reclaim Your Energy & Improve Your Mental Health - Dr Rangan Chatterjee with Dr Kristen Holmes

In our hyper-connected modern world, where we have access to artificial light and food around the clock, we’ve drifted far from our body’s natural rhythms. But what if reconnecting with these internal clocks could be the key to unlocking better health, more energy and even a longer life?

This week's guest is Kristen Holmes, Global Head of Human Performance and Principal Scientist at WHOOP, a Science Advisor to Levels Health and Arena Labs, and a member of the Tactical Leadership Board of Sports Innovation Lab.

In this conversation, we explore the world of circadian biology and how aligning our daily habits with our natural rhythms can transform our health. Kristen explains the far-reaching consequences of a disrupted circadian rhythm, from metabolic disorders and increased ageing to mental health challenges and lower immune function.

We discuss the critical importance of consistent sleep/wake times, even on weekends, and how this simple change can dramatically improve our psychological and physiological functioning. Kristen shares her personal experience of how aligning her circadian rhythms has boosted her productivity, focus, and overall health – she hasn’t been ill for over eight years.

Throughout our conversation, we explore strategies for harmonising our circadian rhythms within the context of modern life. We cover the importance of morning light exposure, the ideal meal timing, and how to manage factors like alcohol and caffeine consumption. Kristen also advises shift workers on maintaining healthy rhythms despite irregular schedules.

This conversation really is packed with actionable insights and I hope that it leaves you feeling empowered to take control of your daily rhythms and experience the transformative effects on your health that can help you tune into your body’s natural rhythms and optimise your health. 

24 September 2024

The Anti-Woke Expert: “We Are Witnessing The Fall Of The UK & The USA!” - The Diary Of A CEO with Konstantin Kisin

Konstantin Kisin is a Russian-British satirist and co-host of the podcast TRIGGERnometry. He is also the best-selling author of the book, ‘An Immigrant's Love Letter to the West’. In this conversation, Konstantin and Steven discuss topics such as, how wokeness has lost true meaning, the dangers of a victim mindset, the real reason men are struggling, and the ongoing war in Ukraine. 

22 September 2024

How To Be More Hopeful In A Cynical World - Modern Wisdom with Dr Jamil Zaki

Dr Jamil Zaki is a psychologist, a professor at Stanford University, and an author.

In a world filled with fake news, bad news and doom, it’s easy to become cynical. But what does science say about whether cynicism helps or harms us? Why is it so seductive, and how can we all learn to become more hopeful?

Expect to learn why people are so tempted by cynicism, how scepticism is different, if cynical people are more or less happy, healthy, intelligent and successful, whether there is a reason to feel more hopeful, the role of optimism in your life, how to cultivate more positivity and much more…

14 September 2024

The Ape that Understood the Universe: How the Mind and Culture Evolve - by Steve Stewart-Williams

The Ape that Understood the Universe: How the Mind and Culture Evolve Hardcover - by Steve Stewart-Williams

The Ape that Understood the Universe is the story of the strangest animal in the world: the human animal. It opens with a question: How would an alien scientist view our species? What would it make of our sex differences, our sexual behaviour, our child-rearing patterns, our moral codes, our religions, our languages, and science? The book tackles these issues by drawing on ideas from two major schools of thought: evolutionary psychology and cultural evolutionary theory. The guiding assumption is that humans are animals and that, like all animals, we evolved to pass on our genes.

At some point, however, we also evolved the capacity for culture - and from that moment, culture began evolving in its own right. This transformed us from a mere ape into an ape capable of reshaping the planet, travelling to other worlds, and understanding the vast universe of which we're but a tiny, fleeting fragment.

1. The Power of the Alien Perspective

To understand ourselves, we must first see ourselves as strange. The book begins with a thought experiment: how would an alien scientist view our species? This "outsider's perspective" allows us to question behaviors and norms that we take for granted, prompting a deeper inquiry into why we are the way we are. The alien's confusion over our complex social structures, mating rituals, and cultural practices sets the stage for the book's exploration of human nature.

2. We Are "Gene Machines"

Stewart-Williams champions a "gene's-eye view" of evolution, a concept popularised by Richard Dawkins. This perspective posits that our bodies and minds are essentially vehicles built by our genes to ensure their own survival and replication. This doesn't mean we are consciously driven by a desire to pass on our genes, but that our behaviours and psychological traits have been shaped by natural selection to achieve this end.

11 September 2024

Evolutionary Psychology - The Diary of a CEO with Dr Gad Saad

Dr Gad Saad is an evolutionary psychologist and Professor of Marketing at Concordia University. He is also the author of books such as, ‘The Parasitic Mind’ and ‘The Saad Truth About Happiness: 8 Secrets for Leading the Good Life’.